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Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Be it a wig, pan dulce or fall colors

Can you believe I lounged in bed this morning, drinking  coffee, and watching music videos from the 80s and 90s.  It felt so weird to just lay there.... but I reminded self that resting is important.

After awhile, I woke up and scrambled me two eggs and topped with home made salsa.


 I heated up a corn tortilla to go along with my eggs.  Eggs are a good way to start the morning, don't you think?

Around 11 a.m., I was craving a snack so I sliced an apple and helped myself to the sunflower seed butter.  Man, that stuff is my favorite.

Afterwards, I decided to change clothes and drive my son home. I did not feel like wearing makeup so I didn't.  That's the beauty of having time off I guess.

The plan was for my son and I to stop off at a wig shop before taking him home. I realize that I am not a turbin or scarf wearing person.  Somehow, those just scream I HAVE CANCER and well, I am tired of C taking up most of my thoughts so I decided a wig is the way to go when the time comes.


I think this wig above is closest to my original hair color and I like the highlights.


I tried on this bob-type wig which I wasn't a fan of....


And of course, you gotta try on a different hair color and length just for shits and giggles.  

After my short experiment with wigs, I asked the sales lady to write down my name and the wig style so that I can return later for it when the time comes.  This way I can just run in and get it if I need it.  You know it helps to plan and this is something I have control over and so the more I can do prior to chemo, the better.

After our wig shopping, we stopped off at a mexican bakery to pick up some pan dulce for my son.  I'm not going to lie. I did have a slice of fresh bread with cheese and jalapenos. I understand that I'll need to avoid spicy food in the weeks to come so I had to get my chile on...

My son lives in mid-town and I just had to take a picture of the leaves across from his apartment.


I just love the way these two trees frame this old building.

Today feels like a good and productive day, even though I lounged around in bed until 10 am.   Finding joy in the smallest of pleasures. Be it a wig, pan dulce, or beautiful fall leaves.

Dinner will be a Asian slaw salad that I'll be prepping later today. HOpe you all have a banging Wednesday.

TTFN.


Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Stepping Out

Hello, my morning started with a bowl of rolled oat, sunflower butter and a dollop of left over cranberry sauce. Yum.... How I missed my oats!  Afterwards, I showered and dressed. I made a "List of things to do before Chemo" and then I headed out to pick up my son to help me shop for those items.

Afterwards, we drove to West Sacramento where I grew up.  We decided to check out the newly opened restaurant named after my home town.  Pretty cool sign, don't you think?   Broderick is located right across the bridge from Old Sacramento.  It's a small community and a great place to grow up.  Especially since you're so close to the River.



Inside, the decor was pretty much your standard Pub/Bar/Grill. Except, the menu was based on the owner's well-known truck called Wicked Wich.  The truck and now the restaurant serves food Pittsburg style which means they  basically pile-on a meal between two buns and call it a day. My son said this style of sammies were geared towards the steel workers in Pittsburgh who wanted meals instead of your typical sandwhich.  

My son encouraged me to LIVE A LITTLE and so with much hesitation, I ordered the Johnny Cash. Ohmylordee.... whataburger.

There was apple smoked bacon, grilled onions and angus beef.  And the fries...  I'm speechless.


I was shocked that I was able to eat as much as I did. At least I left most of the fries, right?

We ate lunch at 12:30 pm. and it's after 6 p.m. as I write this post.  Gosh, I am still FULL.

My son Daniel ordered Ban-Mi which is fries topped with Asian slaw, roasted pork and jalapenos.


It was a nice lunch and we chatted about his recent work on a local election in Sacramento.

I must say, it was a productive day.  However, by the time I got home, I so needed my pain medication.  

It definitely helps when you are able to get outside and be present instead of sitting on the couch watching old movies.

Diet while on Chemo
I did some research last night about what I should eat while undergoing chemo and there is so much information out there.  One vlogger recommended you NOT eat any fresh fruits or vegetables unless they can be peeled.  She even went so far as to say give up salads because there is no real good way to clean them.  

Another vlogger said Cancer hates Cabbage which I love.  I think there might be a way for me to clean veggies carefully. I mean restaurants do it. 

In the interim, I picked up some frozen veggies, clear broths, yogurt, applesauce, soups, crackers and fruit with a peel i.e., cantelope, apple and bananas.  I think I'm as ready as I can be for my first treatment come Friday.

Tomorrow, God willing, I plan on shopping for hats, scarves and ear rings.

Thank you all for your comments on my hair cut.  I appreciate the support from my blog friends.  I have made some great friends here over the years and well, gracias to you all/

Well, it's time for me to settle in so I can watch the finale of Dancing with the Stars.  Gosh, they are all great dancers but I think the trophy will go to Shawn Johnson.  Just my opinion.  Later, gators.

Paula


Monday, November 26, 2012

Happy cyber Monday friends. Anyone find any good deals?

On Sunday, Daniel took me shopping for an early Xmas present. I love my little Canon camera. Cam't wait to test it out.




I was feeling a little bored and so i made a caldo de frijole which is a cross between chile beans and bean soup. I added cajun seasoning, can of stewed tomatoes, garlic, chopped onion, bay leaf and salt and all the ingredients went into the crock pot over night.


Then in the morning, i diced and cooked two Louisiana sausages and added them to the crock pot.

Daniel and had a warm bowl after my morning doctor appointment. I think i will skip the sour cream next time.

I played with my hair this morning and its starting to grow on me. Pun intended...heheh


Feeling great today. So thankful for the great Sacramento weather.

Sunday, November 25, 2012

Expect the Best

Hi friends.  How's your Sunday?

My Sunday started with 2 scrambled eggs with salsa and coffee.  Then it was time to dress for church.  At my church, I have many  long-time friends who attend, and they do not know about my recent double mastectomy.

Let's just say that I have to think carefully about what I am going to wear so it's not noticeable. I will be fitted for a prosthesis in December so in the meantime, it's all about choosing the right clothing. I loathe shopping but alas, I think I need to bite the bullet.

Speaking of biting the bullet, I decided to cut off my hair before starting chemo.  I was not looking forward to this but with Daniel's encouragement, we drove Super Cuts. I asked for a book to see short hair styles and well, does it really matter what I choose at this point?

That said, I just chose a short style and sat in the chair.  I wanted to cry but then recalled Pastor's  words of  "Expect the Best" and I decided to embraced it.  I thought "Darn, just when I got my color and highlights just right."  Then told self "None of that paula... "

Smile paula... 

Surprisingly, it gets easier and I'm actually looking forward to seeing the final result.

Drum roll please.... Can you believe this is the shortest my hair has ever been?

At least my highlights are still visible and I'm saving money on a touch up.

Expecting the Best certainly helps when you're confronted with a difficult task.

As I look in the mirror, I feel different but the same. I guess "C" has a way of doing that to you.  One day I'm walking 7 miles and running an obstacle course with my daughters. Feeling on top of the world.  Suddenly, you find yourself in a completely different place and suddenly, what was, isn't.  But you know what?  It's okay.  You cope. You manage and if you ask God, He gives you strength and peace.  That's how I'm able to smile in this picture. I'm expecting the best.

I've always said PWC was more about the journey to a more healthier life.  Not so much about the scale... I think it still can be. Life throws us these curb balls and we need to adapt and adjust.  Sometimes it's outwardly and sometimes it's inward...

Mind, Body and Soul... who knew they all played an integral part of a healthier and more fitter you.

So instead of increasing my physical stamina, let's just say I'm working on my spiritual and mental stamina.  Yes, they're all connected.

So tell me, what kind of ear rings should I buy? I'm thinking I need to dress up them ears?

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Thankful

Happy Thanksgiving all. Just wanted to check in to wish you all blessings and to say how incredibly thankful i am.


Today, i drove my car to meet friends for coffee. Ran-errands and picked up pies for tomorrow's dinner. It's easy to be thankful when things are coming up roses. It's even more important for us to count our blessings in times of challenges. A lesson that i am grateful for.

Will definitely do my best to go easy on the desserts. Health and fitness is still my priority. Oh, did i mentioned i went for a short walk and it was wonderful? Thankful indeed.

Later, gators,


Monday, November 19, 2012

Fear can be crippling, if you let it.

Hello friends, happy Monday. Can you believe Thanksgiving is just days away?  With that thought,  I felt the need to get out of the house and hit the grocery store.  Daniel is home so I would not need to drive.

It was a process to head out. Let me explain.

First, my drains were removed and I could shower. I was and am scared to see my body in it's new form. I cannot describe the overwhelming emotions that came over me after my appointment.  I found myself crying over the loss of my breast.  It felt almost primal but then.... I was so happy to have a fighting chance against breast cancer and so I told self" ENOUGH....

With that... I showered. Got dressed and wore a bulky sweater.  I felt so blessed with all the support I have received that I felt it was time to bless someone else. So I shopped for a Thanksgiving dinner for a loved one.

It felt good. Then, I sat with a friend who is having a rough time.  I listened and it felt good to be a blessing to someone else.

I am extremely fortunate. I give thanks to God that I am able to say that despite the challenge I am facing. All my fear and anxiety has been given to him.  Every time I have a negative thought or feeling, I remind self that if the thought is neither lovely, pure, truthful or honest that I should vanish it from my mind. It's helping. 

I am waiting for Oncology and chemo.  I am ready to HIT this thing full force. Life is sweet and I am going to enjoy all of it.... regardless of the challenges. I am happy for the visual pictures in my head i.e., climbing Mt. Tallac, climbing a 50 ft. water slide.  Fear can be crippling.  But if you face it. Head on, you feel like a Giant for having done so.  And so, this too I will face and overcome.

I want to wish everyone a wonderful Thanksgiving.  Let's embrace our children, family and friends.   Let's be present.  

This morning, my plan is to shower. Dress and get outside. The sun is shining and maybe I can walk a mile or two... Wish me luck.  Later, gators.  

paula





Thursday, November 15, 2012

Simply delicioso

My siStar Rachel is home with me today helping me out. We watched old Turner Classic movies and then cooked up tacos al pastor.











Tacos al pastor with lots of fresh veggies and company. Don't tell anyone, but being spoiled is nice.

Later gators.
Hi friends, how is the weather? It's a little chilly in Sacramento, but the sun is out.


I am recouping nicely from my surgery. However, my ass is killing me from laying around. Just taking it one day with the goal of eating healthy and resting.

Still do not have the pathologist report back so i don!t know if the sky is falling or not but my goal is to stay positive and enjoy every day blessings.

Today, my sister Rachel is visiting and i will show her how to make Caldo de Cameron. Yesterday, i taught my daughter how to make Posole Verde. As you can see, i find cooking therapeutic.

I will try to share pics of our cooking adventures. In the meantime, i want to thank all for your emails and prayers. Keep the prayers coming, please.

Later, gators.

pwc

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

I want to blog but I don't know what to say these days. I so want my life back prior to finding out about the C.  Then I thought... you had it paula when you hiked, jogged, biked and walked.  You just didn't know.


For the most part, I stay positive. I place my trust in God.   I am not asking for easy... just the strength to get through. I know he will lift me up. He has for every other challenge in my life.  I remind myself that I am right where I am suppose to be. That there are lessons to be learned and there is a higher purpose that God will reveal to me at some point in time.  In the meantime, I tell self: "Patience paula... Patience!  This too shall pass."

And it shall.  In the meantime, I think writing a few upbeat, positive notes around the house will help to keep me grounded.  Discouragement is the devil's most valuable tool and he's not gonna use it on me because I  have the Lord and he is mightier and more powerful.

If you have a scripture or positive verse that you would like to share, I would certainly love to hear it.  My friend shared, ""If you think you're going through hell... Just keep going."  That one made me smile...

Do you have a verse that you rely on in challenging times?  Will you share?

Enough of that---

It's election night and I think I'll visit my son at work.  He's working on a local campaign.  I hope they win. He really believes strongly on his candidate. It's in my old disrict so I'm off.

Thanks for reading. 
PWC

Monday, November 5, 2012

colors

Hi friends.  How's your day?  Mine has been pretty busy.

Breakfast was burrito of nopalitos (cactus), tomoatoes, onions and eggs.  I knew I should not have started my day with carbs because it just starts a domino effect with me wanting sweets.

I had lots of errands on campus.  How lucky am I to pass these wonderful trees 2-3 times a day.

Just look at the vibrant colors?

My plan was to walk at lunch but instead, I drove a few blocks to this restaurant that serves Crepes. I ordered a crepe with fresh fruit and goat cheese.

The powder sugar was perfect. I did not even need the syrup.

My evening will include some sort of activity. Maybe zumba. Maybe a video. Maybe a walk.

What are your plans for the evening?

Saturday, November 3, 2012

joggin in flip flops... yep, I did that today

Good morning folks.  Daniel is back from working out of town and the man never ceases to make me laugh.  I made him carne con chile and tortillas.  I found him in the fridge reading labels. When I asked him what he was doing, he says "just want to make sure you're not giving me goat cheese."  I laughed. I am still laughing.  Really?  The smell alone would give it away.

Can't understand why he doesn't love goat cheese. I mean he grew up on a farm?  Lol.

After breakfast, we went for a walk at Royer Park in Roseville. I was wearing flip flops and felt the need to just jog. I may have done a mile. It felt wonderful.

Never under estimate the power of a brisk walk and jog.

It's funny that maybe we walked/jogged for 40 minutes. I love that 40 minutes doesn't even feel like exercise.  My goal after recovery is to keep moving.  I absolutely love the fall weather and I want to enjoy the warmth of the sun until ugly winter settles in.... When you love to walk, jog, hike, bike... winter becomes your less favorite season..

Yesterday, I had a few moments of sadness. I allowed myself to feel it.  I am sure training someone to fill in for me while I am on leave fueled the sadness.  The sadness did not last amazingly... It's all because I read a verse on a picture that has long been in my kitchen.  It read: "Faith is the bird that sings when the dawn is still dark."  Such powerful words.  I never noticed them before.  It was then that I dried my tears and heeded God's reminder that I trust in him.  He has my back.... Amen.

Well folks, I'm gonna take a shower and enjoy this day. Do the same, okay?

TTFN

Paula

Friday, November 2, 2012

isn't it ironic?

Hi friends.  How are you?  It's been a rough week.  You never know how you are going to react to life-altering news but you surprise yourself. Especially when people are counting on you.  You come through. Of course, all the Glory for the strength, peace and comfort are due to God's mercy.  I will focus on finding Joy in everday things rather than looking at the fear.

I am scheduled for a double mastectomy next week. I am happy for the demands of my job and the cool breeze on my face as I walk back and forth on campus. The leaves around here are just starting to change vibrant orange and brown.  I love Fall and all its temptations. Geez, I can't get enough of pumpkin this, pumpkin that...

Ironic
It's odd how I've been struggling with "hunger" and getting the scale number to climb downwards. All that fretting seems insignificant now. I laughed this morning, as I jumped on the scale and saw a 5lb loss. Hmm.  I usually eat during times of stress and it's having the opposite effect.  Ironic indeed.

Eating
That said, I have learned that eating healthy is important for my mind, body and spirt and so breakfasts are fruit, lunches are lots of green with good proteinm and dessert is banana, yogurt and almond butter. I know these foods are doing good things for me.... No need to change how I eat now.  My quest for a healthier life has taught me to be more active, more health-minded and I know so much more about food combinations.  All this will prepare me for a speedy recovery.

Goals
My goal in the months ahead is to be joyful and happy despite the challenges.  Isn't that a better than allowing "fear" to consume me? That's the power of the Lord. He is nourishing me spiritually.  Thanking him for that...

PSA
Do you mind me giving a PSA?
I was deligent about my mamograms.  My last mamogram was 6 months ago. It was a false negative. I never did breast examinations but I implore you to learn how and do them once a month.  It will make all the difference.  If you do not know how to do a breast exam, I'm sure if you google "breast exam" you will find instructions.  Just do it.

Blogging
I will continue to blog here.  I imagine my content will change so I understand if you do not read. Honestly, I don't want this to be a place for WOE IS ME.  However, I need to continue to write, cook and share my voice. 

Today's Joy
I decided to wear my new boots. I can't believe I found a pair that fit over my thick calves.  I decided to wear them and you know what? I feel pretty cool and almost trendy.  Finding joy in the small things.

Well, gotta get back to work. Later, gators.