Strong

Hello friends, how was your week? Can you believe we Christmas is just 5 days away? The house is as decorated as it can be.  Last year, the day after Christmas, I bought a 7.5 foot tree and several ornaments on sale.  We didn't decorate last year since I was going through treatment but this year, it was on...  My grands came over and decorated the tree. My tree isn't fancy but every ornament is special to me.

I've been having headaches lately but the good news is my CT scan is negative.  No tumor. Just migraines.  I've never dealt with that kind of pain before but an injection and Hydrocodone has helped. I am so incredibly happy to have that CT scan behind me. 

 

Last night I finished my second boot camp and I do believe I'm getting stronger. The scale is actually up but maybe that's because of muscle. I feel amazing after each class. So amazing that I committed to joining the Kaia Fit gym. I'll pay $119 a month but it's cheaper than doing the 6 week classes. On January 6, we start our BRK classes which will be 5 days a week with a running day on Saturday.  I'll have an assessment with a coach and will be required to keep a food journal which I will need to share with my coach each week. 

 

I'm stoked....

 

About my breast reconstruction surgery. I've put that on hold indefinitely.  After meeting with my oncologist and hearing the statistics on my cancer coming back (I'm being positive here. I know I'll be in the percentage where it WON'T COME BACK) so instead of fretting, I will focus on health and fitness and when I'm down to 165, I'll contact my surgeon. Until then, I'll work towards being FIT AND STRONG.  How does that sound?

 

Gosh, I'm happy.  I just wanted to come here and wish you all a merry Christmas.  Talk to  you soon.

12 day challenge

• Our Kaia coaches challenged us to do this 12 day challenge. Sadly, I did not partake. But to my credit, my co-worker and I did a 40 minutes workout at lunch. The weather was gorgeous and we worked out by the pool. I decided to take my own advice and use the gym at work. Time to let go of being self-conscious.
• Another item I want to work on his monitoring my food more closely.  I was keeping a food journal but fell out of the habit.  Time to be more mindful of my eats. I'm even thinking of doing a fast 1 day out of the week.  
• Here is why I need to track my meals.  My co-workers have been indulging in bagels and cream cheese. I am guilty of doing the same. I used to eat a bagel every morning and sadly, I weighed 213 lbs when I did that... TIME TO NIP THAT BAD HABIT.
• My house is decorated for Christmas. It feels festive. A far cry from last year. :-)
• I've been suffering from headache since Thanksgiving. As a precaution, my oncologist scheduled a CT scan for tomorrow. Please say a prayer for me if you have a moment.  I'm trusting in the Lord, but I still need to ask him for good health. So if you'll stand in agreement with me, I'd really appreciate it.
• Well, that's all I got folks. Just wanted to share this 12 day challenge. Let me know how you feel after doing these exercises.  

Later folks.

keep on, keepin on

Exercising after a double mastectomy sans prosthesis.

Hi friends.  Can you believe I did a warm up that included 100 jump ropes before starting boot camp? Man, it felt great. I've not jumped rope since I was a kid.  I am not fast but the fact that I can do them is pretty significant. At least for me.  I asked Daniel to take the picture above when I got home. I left class feeling strong and thin.  I know the picture is not great but I am not thin by any meas.  I felt thin because my t-shirt felt longer.  Looser.

I wanted to share something about  this picture. I am not wearing my prosthesis. It's been 13 months since my double mastectomy.  It's been a tough year is not surprising if you've read PWC for any length of time.  I have felt insecure being in a gym without the prosthesis. It sets me apart.  I've had to check "self-conscousness" at the door when walking into a gym, or the boot camp class designed for woman. Luckily everyone is very supportive.  I know they are because when I'm last to finish a set, I have the coach next to me doing the exercise along side me, with the class rooting and counting down as we finish. Everyone cheers.  Yea, it makes me uneasy but at the same time. I'm here. I"m living this moment. I'm doing my best to live my life.  I want to define the quality of life.  Don't get me wrong. There are moments where I feel sorry for myself, but then I check self because I know it's up to me to make my moments GREAT.  And it's up to you to make your moments great despite your insecurities or what life has dealt you.  Does this make sense?

If you are reading this post and feel self-conscious about going to the gym. Please get over it.  If you feel you are too fat to take a zumba class, You must GET OVER it. Life is short.  Enjoy each day as much as you can. As soon as you wake up.  Decide. Decide right there what kind of day you are going to have. For me, it's calling on God. I remind myself that this is the day the Lord has made for me.  I will rejoice in it... I'm going to have problems. That's a given. But it's up to me to stay calm. Stay out of fear and to keep on keeping on.

Don't let the small shit keep you from missing out.  That's what Cancer has taught me.... keep on, keepin on. I hope if you're reading that you hear what I have to say and do your best to let go of your fears.  Don't let it stop you from enjoying what life has to offer.  Keep on keepin on, okay?

Later gators.
Paula

How to make hand bag weights

Hello, how are you today? It's pretty cold in Sacramento. I hear it's suppose to get in the 20s. Burr... I'm getting ready to head out to boot camp but before I go, I wanted to show you how my daughter and I made hand weights.

We grabbed trash bags and filled them with sand.  We placed them on my scale which was a little challenging.  Once our bags were filled with sand, we tied them and then twisted the remainder of the bag forming a purse handle.  We then got black tape and started wrapping the bag.

We then used decorative tape to wrap the sand bag making it look like a purse.

Here is our 15 lb. hand bag. Isn't it cute?  You must be careful and not grab it by the handle because it's not strong enough. We will use these handbags while doing sit ups, squats, lunges, etc.  The total cost for this little project was $18. Pretty cool, don't you think?

I'm off to boot camp.  Later gators.

H friends, how was your Thanksgiving? I found myself being overwhelmed with gratitude... So much has happened in one year. Today, I had my 4 month check up with a new oncologist.  She says cancer generally returns within 1-2 years. This is something I knew but to have a doctor say it out loud just felt like a punch in the stomach.  I don't want to hear that kind of news... We are doing routine blood work so it's good to be proactive, right? I believe strongly in the power of prayer. Please say a little one for me that all is well.  Gracias.

Yesterday, the weather was gorgeous. Daniel and I decorated the tree in our front yard with lights.  Well, actually, I sat on the bench watching him, listening to some latin music from the 60s, but I was there for what he needed.

I'm looking forward to decorating our tree but it will need to wait for the weekend.  I'm back at work today and I have boot camp this evening.  I think I'm seeing results. Not on the scale but definitely in the way my clothes fit. I've decided to put off reconstruction surgery indefinitely... or at least until I hit my 2 YEAR CANCER FREE MARK.  When I went to the doctor, the scale said 184.  Odd how my scale read 180.  Whatevs.  Not gonna let the scale or fear control me....

I found a mantra that is helping me... FEAR IS A LIAR.  Yes. Fear can be such a dark place and I'm not going to go there. It's up to me to turn those thoughts around. Thoughts that this SHIT will come back... I'm in the Lord's hands and through him, anything is possible. I will be that 25% where it does not come back.

Sorry to come here and be so dark but PWC is my home... It's where I just need to be real with myself... You understand, right?

One day at a time.... that's advice from my mama.  I'm here. God is good and it's up to me to make this day count so I'm going to go to boot camp tonight and give it my all.  Then I'm gong to go home and spend a wonderful evening with Daniel.  I'm so lucky to have him....

Yes, God is good and FEAR IS A LIAR.

One day at a time.