working through the discouragement

Dear friends,

What a weekend.  Sunday was the Urban Cow Half marathon that I've been training for... it was a bitter sweet day.  The Sunday before I felt knee pain from an old knee injury that happened when I was a child.  I saw a doctor and was doing everything I could to heal.  It didn't happen.  Instead my daughter ran in my place. She and my friend did the Relay, each running 6.55 miles.

Here we are taking a pre-run picture. I'm trying to have a brave smile as I see all my awesome Kaia girls excited for their races.  Like our matching shirts?  While I was sad, I was also happy for my daughter and the others.

While my Kaia girls were racing, I joined our cheer squad at mile 1 and 11.

I absolutely love this sign!  And so did the runners who passed us by.

We rang our cow bells and cheered the runners as they came through.  I was so happy to see my daughter at mile 11.

She killed it and finished the second leg of the race in 1.23 minutes. My friend finished the 1st leg in 1.40 minutes.  I was proud of them.

Marathon runners had 4 hours to complete this race. By 11:45, we were still waiting for our last Kaia girl to reach mile 11.  I had been following her training and knew how determined she was to complete 13.1 miles.  She has lost a significant amount of weight and has battled knee pain as well.  I nearly began to cry as we saw her walking towards mile 11.  I saw the determination in her face. You could see the toll on her body and spirit as she walked towards us. Our cheer squad went to meet her and we walked alongside her as she neared the finish line. I couldn't walk all the way because of my knee but I shouted out: ERICA, I AM SO PROUD OF YOU! She turned and smiled.  Have you ever been so happy for another person? I never knew it was possible to be incredibly sad for yourself and happy for another.  I guess I'm learning to be a better person.

I know if I were able to run that race, I would have been 15 minutes or so in front of her.  I heard one girl say out loud: "YOUR RACE, YOUR PACE."  I was so grateful to be part of that cheer squad. I witnesses so much in those few hours. 

....

Afterwards, I met up with both my daughters, son-in-law and grandchildren and we all celebrated my daughter's victory with breakfast at IHOP. It was a wonderful morning.

Later that evening, I was on Facebook looking at everyone's awesome pictures. I think that's when I let myself cry.  I had worked so hard and I wanted that feeling of accomplishment.  I wanted my cowbell.  But I know everything happens for a reason. Maybe I would have beaten myself up over my time.  Who knows.

It was then that I got an in-box message from one of the ladies at Kaia. She's 63 years old and ran the relay. She wanted to know how things went for me at the race.  I told her about my knee but asked how did she do.  She averaged a 13 minute mile.  I recalled her first run and commented on how far she's come since that first run.  

Paula, do not give up.  Eventually it pays off but you have to work through the discouragement and keep going!! 

I needed those words at that very moment.  It's one thing to know this and it's another thing when a 30 year old person tells you this but these words have so much power when a 63 year old woman who just ran 6.55 miles in 13 minutes tells you this... It  meant everything to me.  Imagine being part of a community of woman who inspire and lift you up in so many ways.

Yes, I'm working through the discouragement.... and I'm not giving up.