Notes to Self

Paula, it’s been over a month that you returned to work.  I know it feels awesome to have a routine and to get out of the house.  Sitting in a meeting discussing digital commons and content feels like Christmas….

Paula, you just met with your oncologist to discuss the results of your pet scan… I know you try to remain optimistically hopeful and well, I just know you wanted to  jump for joy when she told you there is no evidence of the tumors… doesn’t mean you’re out of the woods. Just means chemo is working. We can accept that…. 

Paula, your family gathered at your house on Saturday. We made tacos, rice and beans and your son made Mojitos…. You always get so nervous when you entertain.  You cleaned the house and did your best to make things organized, but you still freak out when you have guests.  I was proud of you the way you didn’t freak out when you heard your cousin was visiting. Yes, you did good at being in the moment and how wonderful it was to see him and his lovely wife. Yes, it was a good day.

Paula, I know you absolutely love spending time with your little granddaughter Evie. She just brightens your day… And that hair… It takes your breath away when she gives you a hug….

Paula, you know you need to watch your calorie intake.  I know a lot of your weight gain is due to steroids but hey, that doesn’t mean you  need to keep treating yourself to lunches.

Thacos!!!  Is there anything better?

Tortas... My second favorite food

 Paula, I really like your idea of exercising 20 minutes a day. It’s a wonderful start. No need to get all elaborate... Just make it happen.  It can be as simple as walking or a quick bike ride.  You did great today by walking a little on campus. It's good to have a goal...

Hugs Paula. You're doing awesome...