keep on, keepin on

Exercising after a double mastectomy sans prosthesis.

Hi friends.  Can you believe I did a warm up that included 100 jump ropes before starting boot camp? Man, it felt great. I've not jumped rope since I was a kid.  I am not fast but the fact that I can do them is pretty significant. At least for me.  I asked Daniel to take the picture above when I got home. I left class feeling strong and thin.  I know the picture is not great but I am not thin by any meas.  I felt thin because my t-shirt felt longer.  Looser.

I wanted to share something about  this picture. I am not wearing my prosthesis. It's been 13 months since my double mastectomy.  It's been a tough year is not surprising if you've read PWC for any length of time.  I have felt insecure being in a gym without the prosthesis. It sets me apart.  I've had to check "self-conscousness" at the door when walking into a gym, or the boot camp class designed for woman. Luckily everyone is very supportive.  I know they are because when I'm last to finish a set, I have the coach next to me doing the exercise along side me, with the class rooting and counting down as we finish. Everyone cheers.  Yea, it makes me uneasy but at the same time. I'm here. I"m living this moment. I'm doing my best to live my life.  I want to define the quality of life.  Don't get me wrong. There are moments where I feel sorry for myself, but then I check self because I know it's up to me to make my moments GREAT.  And it's up to you to make your moments great despite your insecurities or what life has dealt you.  Does this make sense?

If you are reading this post and feel self-conscious about going to the gym. Please get over it.  If you feel you are too fat to take a zumba class, You must GET OVER it. Life is short.  Enjoy each day as much as you can. As soon as you wake up.  Decide. Decide right there what kind of day you are going to have. For me, it's calling on God. I remind myself that this is the day the Lord has made for me.  I will rejoice in it... I'm going to have problems. That's a given. But it's up to me to stay calm. Stay out of fear and to keep on keeping on.

Don't let the small shit keep you from missing out.  That's what Cancer has taught me.... keep on, keepin on. I hope if you're reading that you hear what I have to say and do your best to let go of your fears.  Don't let it stop you from enjoying what life has to offer.  Keep on keepin on, okay?

Later gators.
Paula